I read a good friend’s blog yesterday and in tapped into my core. Sometimes certain things trigger thoughts in me that I just cannot overlook.

I am an advocate for the children of tomorrow. Yes I believe that it is the parents’ responsibility to instill morals and certain things that just cannot be learned from a textbook. I also believe that it is the teachers’ job and responsibility to instill or teach the knowledge that will overall help to define the way these students will survive life. Hence the old adage, “it takes a village to raise a child.”

When did the other members of the village bale out? Seems to me like nothing but a cop out. That is a topic for another place and another time. My focus is parents living their dreams through their children and also pitting one child again the other.

I have three children. For as long as I could remember I have told all of them that I am raising leaders not followers. That is the utmost truth. I don’t want a child who needs someone to think for them, God blessed them with a brain and a good head on their shoulder. They should know how to use it.

I expect nothing but the best performance from my children. Why? I gave it my all when growing up, I put forth a valiant effort and if I didn’t do so great, my parents were ok with it just because they know I tried my hardest.

Everything I ever wanted to do I did it no matter what my consequence was going to be. So I lived as I wanted to live and still do to this day. I do not try to force my dreams of things I would have liked to have done as a child on my kids. They have their own dreams, it’s their time to shine and I will not take that away from them.

If ones does good on something I cheer that child on, but I don’t do it in a way where the others feel less than the other. I don’t care how small the achievement, I refuse to let it go without them knowing how proud I am. Often times we as parents, let the good slide on by, but the bad is made into a bigger deal than necessary. I know at times I am guilty of over highlighting things that they do wrong, but I do that also with the good.

I will tell everyone that we know about all the good. Did you know she is in the gifted program at school? Yes she brings home only As and Bs. Did you know that he is really good in math? Did you know that he is only two and gets himself dress, even with his shoes on the right feet? Things like this I share with everyone.

Then my daughter has her stinky attitude, my oldest son has ADHD (which causes him to boil my blood at times) and my two year old will continuously ask you the same question over and over again until he gets his way or I flip out. Never do I say to one why you can’t be more like your sister, why can’t you be more like your brother… Know why, because the answer to that is they are not the other one. They are the sole entity of their self, even their mirror image is not completely like the original version.

People understand that your children need reassurance, not brow beating. Let them be who they will be, don’t try to mold them into a version of you that you wish you were. Think about what it was like for you growing up. Remember the things that you did that pissed you off because they wanted you to do things that were just not what you wanted to.

Take for instance when I was trying to figure out the answer to this question: Jennifer, when you grow up, what do you want to be?

The real answer is me. The real question should have been: Jennifer, when you grow up, what do you want to do?

I would have then answered, a teacher…an English teacher. But my father wanted me to be a nurse so I contemplated his pipe dream for a long while and tucked the real me away for a long time. Now I will be thirty this year and realized that I want to go back to college, so that I can one finish and two become that English teacher that I wanted to be so badly, but wasn’t because I did not have the proper parental backing.

Parents remember that we are raising the leaders of tomorrow. It is your duty as a parent to make sure you are not feeding your children your negativity, or your pipedreams. Help them to achieve their dreams, goals and aspirations. That’s the way it ought to be…

I am an advocate for the written word. If I can type it I will and sometimes, I am overpowered with the need to put pen to paper and do my writing the old-fashion style, with my hand…

But I have a problem with the impersonal text message on my cell phone. I don’t want to be asked anything via a text. If you want me to do something, pick up the phone and call me. Do not under any circumstance text me because I will ignore your message.

Texting is so impersonal, think of the person that you are reaching out to. If they are anything like me it seems as if they are good enough to do something for you, but not good enough to talk to. There is only ten numbers to make a call, but you have to type those ten numbers and the words you need to type in order to send a text message. The call is faster but that is just my opinion. Everyone has one…

Jealous: feeling bitter and unhappy because of another’s advantages, possessions, or luck (definition provided by Encarta Dictionary

I am on a roll this week. People beware I am going to blog about it if it affects the way I feel and view you.

I remember when growing up I was not favored by many…my brother and sister being the favorites of my parents and then there was me, black sheep. I have since spoken my mind on this with my mother. Anyway, I know that I was jealous of the extra love that I felt that my siblings received from my parents. However, I was young then.

I am exposed to a forty something year old woman who is very jealous of any relationship that does not include her. If the information is not provided to her, no matter what the subject matter, even if it doesn’t concern her she is pissy. I don’t understand why.

If it does not involve you, then why should it concern you? It takes so much time to focus on what someone else has and I may want. I am not going to waste my best years wondering how it is to be you and have all the things that you have. I will go out and get it, if I want it that badly.

My blessings do not include jealousy…being jealous takes away from what blessing are to come. I need all the blessing I can get.

I can’t remember what day it was when a friend of mine was telling me about how one morning as she walked her daughters to the bus stop, instead of cutting cross the grass they were walking around the long way. Which was odd for them since that is the route they take every morning.

She asked them, “Girls why are you walking around the long way?”

The oldest responds, “Because there is dog boo boo on the grass.”

That is when my friend looks down and sees dog mess all over the grass. Just nasty!
Well the next Sunday I was standing on the top of my steps inside my house, looking out the front door, when what do I notice, my neighbor’s son from across the street with his dog on a leash…the dog was pissing on my mailbox and flowers. He then walks to the large side of my lawn and the dog started to circle with his tail up trying to get into the position to crap on my lawn.

I rushed down my step and out the door and I say to him, “Can you get your dog off my lawn please?”

He says, “Sure no problem.”

He yanks the dog off my lawn. What he failed to realize is that it wasn’t a question it was a demand. My children play on the lawn, all the time, not any more of course.

I then made a revelation. This is so symbolic to life; we walk with our personal crap and dump it at someone else’s home. Why is that?

Why is human’s so prone to take the garbage they have at home and place it on someone else. I am sick of it. I try so hard to keep whatever is bothering me or going on with me to myself, because no one really cares what I am going through. They pry and want to know but that is just because gossip and garbage last longer than positive uplifting experiences in the memory of folks that pretend to be “your friend.” These are things that in the future they can use as ammo to hurt me and mine.

The same thing is for certain in your life. So be careful what kind of trash you allow the world to see you putting out. The old saying one person’s trash is another person’s treasure. Don’t let you sadness be someone else’s happiness.

I was thinking this morning about all the things I have seen and heard throughout my almost thirty years on this earth. Do you know what I realized? People do and say some of the craziest things, but a lot of people are experiencing a lot of pain.

My best friend of ten years has told me a lot of things about her younger years, she is fourteen years older than me, but what I remember this morning was about her and her mother being homeless and her older brothers and sisters not wanting to help. See my best friend is the baby of six children for her parents; her father has other children after her. I know that she told me some other things, like on her honeymoon in Mexico, she learned how to swim. But then the fact that she is now divorce comes to mind.

I wonder why the only things that resonate in my mind are the sad times. Am I a dark-minded individual or is it that I handle sadness in a different way. I think I handle sadness differently. Many people just deal with it and let it go; I on the other hand, marinate in it and let it take up unnecessary space in my mind and heart. I guess it is because I have always associated love with pain. My whole life I have seen nothing but hurt.

While growing up I truly don’t remember any happy times at all. I was so sad that I took to reading and writing so that I could escape my every day home life. I wanted the world of happily ever after. I didn’t realize then that all that I had wanted were things that I needed to work on. Yes, I did deserve those things, as do everyone in the world, but if we don’t strive for them, well we should not expect to receive them.

In realizing this, I try to keep my negativity to myself. Because there are times when I hit an all time low and I am so negative that I see life in black, not even an ounce of white or any color to boot. When I get in these negative funks, I am not really sure what transpired to make me feel the way I feel, but I get there. I sometimes pick up on others funky vibes and it stays with me and seep into my emotions. I hate that. I wonder if that is how psychics feel.